See the UCBW MegaStars every Thursday at 11 PM at the UCB Theatre's CageMatch, and special Saturdays at midnight for Pay Per View events.

Follow us on twitter! @UCBW

Like us on Facebook!

"If you think that pro wrestling—with it's soap opera story arcs, fake moves and silly costumes—couldn't be funnier or more ridiculous than it already is, watch it get mocked by these UCBT performers."
—Time Out New York

"The WWE is pretty hilarious on its own, but the UCB Theatre’s wrestling federation, the UCBW, pays such good attention to the details of the genre, it feels less like a satirical mockery and more of a hyper-hilarious homage to the dramatic sport. It’s impossible not to get caught up in their hysteria."
—New York Press

"The price of admission gets you a whole seat, but you only need the edge."
—Flavorpill

"These guys (and girls) pay tribute to the pro-wrestling they love with their hybrid of comedy/wrestling and super-ridiculous ringside commentary - so many talented performers, and an incredibly supportive crowd!"
—Wrestling Legend, Standup Comedian & Bestselling Author Mick Foley

"These top-notch improv comics are really hilarious, and totally respectful. These guys take us fans seriously enough to just let us be little kids again."
—David Shoemaker (The Masked Man), Deadspin & Grantland

To submit a MegaStar application, please e-mail UCBW.info@gmail.com.

Oct 20
Permalink

AutumnSlamn Results!

AutumnSlamn was a wild ride ladies and gentlemen! It kicked off with Chuck McMahon and Uncle Eddie running down the card. Soon after, Chugger Deets tried to conduct an interview with UCBW Intercontinental Heavyweight Champion of the World Transit Cop. 

The PPV took an disturbing turn when the incredibly creepy Beauty School introducing their latest student, the now Bloodless Mary. The four of them did a very weird and scary dance. After this, three MORE women in Beauty School masks entered. However, the three new ladies revealed themselves to be The Teeny Bopper, Tomboy, and The Queen of Cheese! Very quickly it became clear that this bout was less about who got the W, and more about the mental well-being of the UCBW Women’s Champion, with QoC and Tomboy’s offense on Mary focusing on reminding her who she really was. It was one of the weirder matches in UCBW, as somehow Mademoiselle Cosmo-Vogue managed to make everyone in the match join in on Beauty School’s incredibly eerie ballet. Eventually, it turned into an all out war. When the dust settled, the Beauty School retreated as Teeny Bopper gave birth live on stage while Bloody Mary got her period again. This marks the 2nd time a live birth has taken place during a UCBW PPV. 

Next was the UCBW Hardcore Title match of Old Fishstix, the champ, defending his title against the disgusting vile BEDBUG! And, boy, did this live up to the name of HARDCORE! Bedsheets, flags, steel chairs, nets, tables, a ship’s wheel, a fishing pole, and a pillow were all used in this hot match! Things looked bleak for Fishstix when Bedbug used his infestation and brought in his insect minions, two fellow bedbugs and CHIKARA’s Fire Ant. But the hardcore champion managed not only to survive, but throw them all overboard! And then pick up the win with an absolutely crazy elbow drop through a table for the three!
Next we saw another dangerous contest: the Contract In A Fanny Pack Stepladder Match! 7 of UCBW’s newest MegaStars (Fancy Lad, Vance Deferens, Party Pete, The Babymaker, The Orphan, Justin Time and Laundry Matt) and one veteran (Panda) risked their lives for a chance at immortality! Temporary friendships made, and then broken. Laundry Matt hit a seven man Spin Cycle, Vance Deferens got his balls caught in the ladder, and the audience lost their minds! Especially when it looked like Panda was going to win, only to grab a bamboo stick from the ceiling! Even more so when UCBW Junior Official, Ref Tarzan got so caught up in the action that he pushed Justin Time off the stepladder and retrieved the Fanny Pack himself before reality set in that he was not a participant and tied the Fanny Pack back up. Eventually, Party Pete hit his signature dive, Body Shots, OFF THE STEPLADDER!!! As he climbed back up for the contract, Justin Time froze time, removed Party Pete, and got the Fanny Pack. But in a shocking turn of events, Time realized he hadn’t earned the victory, tied the Fanny Pack back up, put Party Pete on the ladder and let this timeline live on. Party Pete is Mr. Contract In A Fanny Pack!
A brand new Megastar who trained in Smokey Mountain Wrestling, Froot Boots, issued an open challenge to any 3 Audience Members. The prize of this challenge was not only glory, but his $10,000 Rollerblades. The same rollerblades on which Froot Boots had been train in the arts of karate, ju jitsu, grappling and “some stuff you haven’t even heard of.” Starting off on the wrong foot, Froot Boots tripped and the audience members pounced, beating him up, tea-bagging him, defecating on him, sodomizing him with a gord and ultimately stealing his rollerblades. Afterwards, Froot Boots cried as he was forced to eat the shit.
 
In attendance for the next contest was the legendary Bang Family: Stu, Helen, Ramone, Bruce, Keiran, and Smith. All of whom, besides Helen, were firmly in the corner of Preston in the Loser Leaves Town match between the former two-time UCBW Tag Team champions, The Bang Bros. Helen simply didn’t want her sons fighting each other at all. But that didn’t stop Shaggy from kicking his kin square in the dick or choking him out with their own mother’s pearl necklace. At one point, things broke down and the other Bang brothers got involved in the match, wherein Keiran and Smith ended up having to have sex with each other for money and poor Bruce Bang took a goddamn disgusting 69 Driver from Shaggy. The end of the match saw Preston and Shaggy laid out, calling for a fluffer, who showed up and teased both men as well as the audience by slowly revealing who’s side she was on; Shaggy’s! At this point, Helen had seen enough and GOT UP FROM HER WHEELCHAIR to make this “young hussy” fluff Preston as well. She begrudgingly obliged, the took a swing at Helen only to get a Cherry Popper and a spanking. The rest of the Bang Family touched themselves watching this happen, not realizing that Ref Robot Riley was counting to 10 while Preston and Shaggy were on the ground. He reached 10 and both men lost, meaning they BOTH have to leave town. They were all disappointed and shocked and then a plastic bag blew onstage to open the eyes of the Bangs to a whole new world of beauty. They patched things up and followed the bag off into the sunset. 

The main event saw Transit Cop put up the
 UCBW World Heavyweight Intercontinental Championship of the World up against, the former champion, “The Manly Man” Randy Manly. Manly put up a hell of a fight, until an accidental flash from UCBW photographer Arin blinded both Manly and Referee Riley. Seeing an opening, Transit Cop called for backup: BEDBUG! Bedbug sucked the blood out of Manly, and a weakened Manly could not resist the offer of  a Jack Link’s Beef Jerky Stick, which was ACTUALLY EBOLA. Transit Cop hit the sickly Manly Man with the Last Stop DDT and got the three, retaining his title. 
Then Riley smashed a pumpkin.
Comments (View)
Oct 06
Permalink
AUTUMNSLAMN is on Friday, October 17th at 11:59pm!
Will Bloody Mary become a full fledge member of Beauty School, or can Teenybopper, Queen of Cheese, and Tomboy save her bloody soul?
Who will win the Fanny Pack?
Only one Bang Bro will be allowed to stay in NYC- will Preston drive off into the sunset? Will Shaggy hit the road solo?
Who the hell is Froot Boots?
Is Bed Bug man or bug enough to defeat Olde Fishstix and become the new UCBW Hardcore Champion?
Can “Manly Man” Randy Manly dethrone Transit Cop and take the UCBW Intercontinental Championship back from the militarized transit police?
What is WB Mason and why are they the corporate sponsors of UCBW AutumnSlamn?
To find out the answers to these questions, buy your tickets now and we’l see you at the UCBW Arena on Oct 17th!

AUTUMNSLAMN is on Friday, October 17th at 11:59pm!

Will Bloody Mary become a full fledge member of Beauty School, or can Teenybopper, Queen of Cheese, and Tomboy save her bloody soul?

Who will win the Fanny Pack?

Only one Bang Bro will be allowed to stay in NYC- will Preston drive off into the sunset? Will Shaggy hit the road solo?

Who the hell is Froot Boots?

Is Bed Bug man or bug enough to defeat Olde Fishstix and become the new UCBW Hardcore Champion?

Can “Manly Man” Randy Manly dethrone Transit Cop and take the UCBW Intercontinental Championship back from the militarized transit police?

What is WB Mason and why are they the corporate sponsors of UCBW AutumnSlamn?

To find out the answers to these questions, buy your tickets now and we’l see you at the UCBW Arena on Oct 17th!

Comments (View)
Aug 11
Permalink

Here are the results for the 9th annual UCBW ReVengeance PPV, baby!:

In a HOT opener, the UCBW Hardcore Champion, Old Fishstix successfully defended not only his title, but his facial hair as well, defeating The Timekeeper, Justin Time in a Beard vs. Beard/Title Match! Sal The Barber really went to town on Time’s facial follicles as everyone laughed and made fun of him.

The Direct Deposit match, saw three Megastars risk their careers and lives, climbing a stepladder to retrieve Main$treet’s wallet, swipe his credit card in an ATM and retrieve his money. The coked-up Abominable Snowman retrieved the wallet and swiped the card, but an unsuccessful PIN attempt gave Main$treet the time he needed to mount a comeback. However, despite being shot so many times by a machine gun, Crust Punk came crashing back into the match and THROUGH the ATM to grab all the money and his first victory!

Beach Cop, the holder of the Contract-in-A-Fanny-Pack (allowing him to have a shot at World Heavyweight Intercontinental Championship of the World match, any time, anywhere, which he won at last year’s ReVengeance and has openly said he’ll never cash in) successfully defended said Fanny Pack in a 7-Man Battle Royal, featuring The Doorman, Panda, Vance Deferens, This Charming Man, Johnny 101, and Laundry Matt!

In contest that would rank around a 10.5 on the Muta Scale (NOT a typo), The Teenybopper and The Queen of Cheese tried their darndest to take the Women’s Championship off of Bloody Mary, but just got their faces dumped in a Diva Cup for their trouble. Bloody Mary won by hitting a double Panty Liner on both women without the help of her husband, Bedbug, as he was stuck on the 5 train at the time.

A brand new Megastar just signed from a promotion out in North Carolina, Froot Boots, issued an open challenge to any 3 Audience Members. The prize of this challenge was not only glory, but his $10,000 Rollerblades. The same rollerblades on which Froot Boots had been train in the arts of karate, ju jitsu, grappling and “some stuff you haven’t even heard of.” Starting off on the wrong foot, Froot Boots tripped and the audience members pounced, beating him up, tea-bagging him, defecating on him, and ultimately stealing his rollerblades. Afterwards, Froot Boots cried as he was forced to eat the shit.

CHIKARA’s Fire Ant & Silver Ant defended the UCBW Tag Team titles they won back at AutumnSlamn in a gauntlet match. Despite being fried with a magnifying glass, they advanced through the first match against The Party Boyz. The second match saw them facing their longtime UCBW rivals, The Bang Bros, whom fell short after failing to hit one of their more risky signature moves, More Bang For Your Buck. After which, the Colony had thought they won the whole thing and began celebrating with The Grandmas. Little did they realize,The Grandmas were the next participants and ended up getting pinned by the old dames after slipping on some loose pills, making The Grandmas UCBW’s first ever female and first ever geriatric Tag Team Champions.

The main event saw The Douche put his title and his career on the line against the living legend, The Black Planet, Marz. A brutal and bloody bout that saw run-ins from CHIKARA’s Mr. Azerbaijan and The Colony, blew the roof off the place when Marz made The Douche tap out to the Marz Shooter, ending The Douches reign of terror, not just as champion, but in the locker room. After the match, The Douche grabbed a mic and gave a teary-eyed, heartfelt goodbye. Only to immediately tell every one there that he hated them.

In a crazy turn of events, Beach Cop, who had come out presumably to celebrate his good friend, Marz’s victory ended up cashing in is beloved Contract-in-A-Fanny-Pack. Marz wasn’t going down easily. Beach Cop tried to raise the sun, but Marz pulled it back down in some cool reversal of the Elton John lyrics that he loves so very much that served as an odd, but poetic metaphor for what happened to him next. The sun went down on Marz’s title reign, when Beach Cop revealed himself to no longer be that, in fact. Losing his towel and shorts, he put on long pants and an MTA patch becoming Transit Cop and ultimately winning the UCBW World Heavyweight Intercontinental Champion of The World to a chorus of boos.

Comments (View)
Aug 04
Permalink

UCBW’s ReVengeance is this Saturday at 11:59pm at the UCB Theatre Chelsea! Buy tickets!

THE MAIN EVENT:

UCBW World Intercontinental Heavyweight Championship of the World:

The Black Planet Himself: Marz (challenger) vs. The Douche (champion)

If The Douche loses the title, he will retire!

Hardcore Championship vs. Beard Match:

Old Fishstix (champion) vs. Justin Time (challenger)

Loser gets their beard shaved in the ring!

Tag Team Championship Gauntlet Match:

Featuring - Chikara’s Fire Ant & Silver Ant of The Colony (champions) vs. The Bang Bros vs. The Party Boyz 

Women’s Championship Match:

Bloody Mary vs. The Teenybopper vs. Queen Cheese

Bed Bug as the special guest referee!

Direct Deposit Match:

Main $treet vs. Crust Punk vs. The Abominable Snowman

Beach Cop’s Fanny Pack Dirty Dozen MegaStar Invitational Rumble:

Featuring - The Door Man, Laundry Matt, This Charming Man, Johnny 101, Vance Deferens, Panda

Special Attraction:

Froot Boots will issue an Open Challenge

Plus: The Grandmas and TONS of surprises!

Featuring: Referee Tarzan & hosted by the Voices of the UCBW – Uncle Eddie and Chuck McMahon!

Comments (View)
Apr 07
Permalink
UCBW WrestleSlamMania is this Saturday at 11:59pm!
Make a reservation! Let  us know you’re coming on our facebook event!
For more than eight years, UCBW has brought you hot Comedy Wrestling action each and every week at CageMatch. For an unprecedented NINTH consecutive year, UCBW will present it’s signature show — the grandpappy of ‘em all, the showcase of mortals -- WrestleSlamMania IX!Rivalries have been brewing, and everything will come to a boil when the full roster of UCBW MegaStars appears in the squared circle! Hilarious REAL wrestling matches LIVE on Pay-Per-View!*Get your tickets NOW!Only 14,000 seats available! THE MAIN EVENT:UCBW World Intercontinental Heavyweight Championship of the World:Main $treet (challenger) vs. The Douche (champion)ALSO:UCBW Tag Team Championship Triple Threat Match: Green Ant & Fire Ant of The Colony (champions) vs. The Bang Bros vs. The Party BoyzUCBW Hardcore Fucking Menage a Trois Hardcore Championship Match: Old Fishstix (champion) vs. The Abominable Snowman vs. Crust PunkCakeFace Memorial Battle Rumble: featuring - The Door Man, Sweet Daddy Jazz, Justin Time, Bed Bug, Johnny 101, #HeartThrob, El Gimpo, and more!Triple Threat Match for the UCBW Women’s Championship: Bloody Mary (w/ Bed Bug) vs. The Teenybopper vs. Bitsy Bradford (champion)An Open Challenge by FROOT BOOTS!PLUS: “Manly Man” Randy Manly, and many MORE surprises!Featuring Referee Robot Riley, Referee Tarzan & hosted by the Voices of the UCBW – Uncle Eddie, Chuck McMahon & Chugger Deets!CARD SUBJECT TO CHANGEFollow us on Twitter @UCBW*show not actually available on pay-per-view
Make a reservation! Let  us know you’re coming on our facebook event!

UCBW WrestleSlamMania is this Saturday at 11:59pm!

Make a reservation! Let  us know you’re coming on our facebook event!

For more than eight years, UCBW has brought you hot Comedy Wrestling action each and every week at CageMatch. For an unprecedented NINTH consecutive year, UCBW will present it’s signature show — the grandpappy of ‘em all, the showcase of mortals -- WrestleSlamMania IX!

Rivalries have been brewing, and everything will come to a boil when the full roster of UCBW MegaStars appears in the squared circle! Hilarious REAL wrestling matches LIVE on Pay-Per-View!*

Get your tickets NOW!

Only 14,000 seats available! 

THE MAIN EVENT:
UCBW World Intercontinental Heavyweight Championship of the World:
Main $treet (challenger) vs. The Douche (champion)

ALSO:

UCBW Tag Team Championship Triple Threat Match: Green Ant & Fire Ant of The Colony (champions) vs. The Bang Bros vs. The Party Boyz

UCBW Hardcore Fucking Menage a Trois Hardcore Championship Match: Old Fishstix (champion) vs. The Abominable Snowman vs. Crust Punk

CakeFace Memorial Battle Rumble: featuring - The Door Man, Sweet Daddy Jazz, Justin Time, Bed Bug, Johnny 101, #HeartThrob, El Gimpo, and more!

Triple Threat Match for the UCBW Women’s Championship: Bloody Mary (w/ Bed Bug) vs. The Teenybopper vs. Bitsy Bradford (champion)

An Open Challenge by FROOT BOOTS!

PLUS: “Manly Man” Randy Manly, and many MORE surprises!

Featuring Referee Robot Riley, Referee Tarzan & hosted by the Voices of the UCBW – Uncle Eddie, Chuck McMahon & Chugger Deets!

CARD SUBJECT TO CHANGE

Follow us on Twitter @UCBW

*show not actually available on pay-per-view

Make a reservation! Let  us know you’re coming on our facebook event!

Comments (View)
Mar 18
Permalink

On March 18th, 2006, UCBW had their first PPV entitled WrestleSlamMania. The first UCBW referee Pat Baer, now retired to Blowjob Island, recounts the night for UCBW.info

They said it couldn’t, and shouldn’t be done. We were only supposed to host cagematch. A promo here, a match there, that was all anyone expected of us. But we proved to everyone we could be more. When Chuck McMahon bought cagematch from Kevin Mullaney, he had a vision to create a comedic wrestling promotion that could be more than just hosts and distractions. He envisioned WrestleSlamMania. Nine matches. Five titles on the line. UCB Theatre Celebrities. All for only $8. It seemed crazy. And it was.

I started referring in Smokey Mountain Wrestling, never thinking I would someday get the call to be a ref for a comedy promotion in New York City. Blocks away from Madison Square Garden, the UCBW arena quickly became a mecca for the best comedy wrestlers in the world. International superstars like Binary Code, Big Island, and Foreign Menace traveled great distances to be apart of history. Upstart youngsters like Doctor Money Bags, Cakeface, Coach Johnson, Cha Cha Tango, and Ma Jessa  came with me from Smokey Mountain. Lezzie Steele, the best female wrestler in the world, came out of retirement. Celebrities like GI Joe, Orion Pax, Charlie Brown, and Hulk Hogan’s brother Frank Bollea were calling us to be a part of the historic night. Sean Hart and Ken Keech, performers at the UCB Theatre, knew we were taking a huge risk and came on board to appeal to the traditional comedy fans. They were outsiders in our industry, but they respected it. It was a pleasure to ref their ladder match over who had to pay rent on the apartment they shared.  

The legendary announce team of Pee Pee Jackson and Sky Goldfarb were set in place to call all the action. That would have been more than enough, until at the last moment a deal was stuck to bring in the best interviewer in all of comedy wrestling. The legendary TT Billingsworth would be stationed just outside the locker rooms, bringing the hard hitting questions directly to the UCBW Megastars.

Chuck McMahon even stepped from behind the scenes into the limelight, as he declared himself the special guest referee for the main event. And what a main event! Pu Kang Kang, our first champion, was already an accomplished performer. Thrown into the mix was Marz the Black Planet. An unknown in the industry handpicked by Chuck McMahon, Marz had everything going for him. 

Titles changed hands, laughs were had, and in the end we knew we had all accomplished something special. I know that my life changed, for the better. I will always love UCBW, and I will never forget that amazing night 8 years ago.

~Retired Senior Referee Pat Baer

In April, WrestleSlamMania 9 will be another instant classic. Stay tuned for more info. 

(all photos by Chuck McMahon’s personal ring photographer)

Comments (View)
Feb 28
Permalink

Last night we had the formation of a new tag team, the debut of a new mega star, and the surprise return of a champion!

Shaggy and Preston (aka The Bang Bros) took on a brand new tag team Sweet Beach! Longtime friends Sweet Daddy Jazz and Beach Cop already looked like a fantastic team in their debut, but they were in for a surprise! A pizza delivery turned violent when youngest Bang Bros Shooter Bang rang the doorbell, then cleaned house! After a filthy victory, the Bang Bros trio celebrated until Fire Ant made his own surprise appearance. Fire Ant, one half of the tag champs The Colony, took out all three Bang Bros in an amazing display of for-real wrestling. 

We’ll have more comedic wrestling action for you next week!

(all photos taken by Arin Sang-urai)

Comments (View)
Feb 21
Permalink

Birthday Boy vs Abominable Snowman

Last night saw the debut of two brand UCBW Mega-Stars. The Birthday Boy’s birthday wish was to wrestle in a match! The Abominable Snowman’s wish was to continue to do cocaine, or as he calls it “snow”.

We’ll have some tag team action next week! Make a reservation!

Comments (View)
Dec 14
Permalink
chrisreblogs:

brenttharshman:

This being will be at UCBW Hanukkaos tomorrow night at 11:59. You should go!

!!!!!!!! DR. CUBE !?!?!?

Dr. Cube will be competing at UCBW’s Hanukkaos in one of our Eight Crazy Fights! Make a reservation!

chrisreblogs:

brenttharshman:

This being will be at UCBW Hanukkaos tomorrow night at 11:59. 

You should go!

!!!!!!!! DR. CUBE !?!?!?

Dr. Cube will be competing at UCBW’s Hanukkaos in one of our Eight Crazy Fights! Make a reservation!

(Source: televandalist)

Comments (View)
Nov 18
Permalink
curtisraye:

Referee Robot Riley gets viciously injured by a slider chair.

curtisraye:

Referee Robot Riley gets viciously injured by a slider chair.

Comments (View)